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A Personal Message
I didn’t write this book because I wanted to.
I wrote it because I had to.
As a relationship coach, I’ve sat across from too many couples whose love didn’t end because of infidelity, abuse, or betrayal, but because of kindness. Quiet, well-intentioned, boundaryless kindness.
I’ve watched partners disappear behind the mask of being “the helpful one.” I’ve listened to women try to explain, through tears, that they’re not jealous, just exhausted from always coming second. I’ve worked with men who were praised by everyone except the person they promised to protect emotionally, and they couldn’t understand why their relationship was failing.
That’s why this book exists.
Because no one is warning you about this kind of relationship death.
No one is telling you that over-helping can become emotional abandonment.
And no one is giving you the tools to stop it - until now.
Let me be blunt.
Most advice out there? It tells you to be more present, but not how to restructure your emotional availability.
It tells you to communicate better, but not what to say when your kindness has already created distance.
It tells you to protect your relationship, but doesn’t show you what to do when being a “good person” has made you a disconnected partner.
This book is different.
What you’re holding isn’t feel-good advice or another vague guide full of clichés.
It’s a mirror, a toolkit, and a path forward, designed to break the pattern before your partner gives up quietly, without a fight.
It is based on lived experience, real coaching sessions, and what I’ve seen again and again in people who never expected to lose each other, because no one told them they were drifting until it was too late.
If you’re the one who always says yes, who loves to be useful, who prides yourself on being dependable, but your relationship feels like it’s slowly slipping through your fingers, this is your wake-up call.
If you’re the one who feels left behind, unchosen, unseen, you are not crazy, needy, or selfish for wanting more.
You are asking for what every emotionally safe relationship is built on: presence, protection, and priority.
Read this book. Use it. Talk about it.
Because very few people are brave enough to name this issue.
Even fewer know how to fix it.
And those who do? They don’t wait.
Viktor Domahidy
Relationship Coach
Founder, Love Lab Coaching, mylovelab.ca